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October 30, 2014

The Conclusion to The Master Cleanse

By some miracle of God, I made it through the Master Cleanse alive.  Hopefully, my body is thankful because that wasn’t easy.

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Day 5 I felt good. I was halfway there.  I spent most of the day staring at the soup recipe I got to make on the 12th day that helps transition the digestive system to solid foods again. Potatoes, rice, celery, carrots.  Was it too soon to buy the groceries?

Day 6 I dreamt of steak. I was eating steak. Stabbed the steak right in the center of it and turned my fork around with the whole thick, juicy, steak balancing on top and tore a huge bite off the side, like an animal.

Day 7 I felt the detox. I woke up feeling better. Like maybe this was actually kind of working in whatever way detoxing works. My body felt alive, and functioning like a well-oiled machine.  As if each body organ was completing the task it was assigned to as I went about my day.  Finally, my body was realizing I was trying to detox, let it take a break from working so hard, FINALLY!

Day 8 I was over it. This was an extremely boring idea of mine. I wasn’t hungry anymore, the juice definitely filled me up. I wasn’t craving all the food I saw people eating anymore (besides potatoes..?), the juice still tasted good. But I was over it.  I even felt too normal. Not hungry, no side effects like headaches, juice easily prepared for the day.  The detox was getting too easy? With no challenge, there was no fun.

Day 9 I watched Netflix. Pretty Little Liars to be specific. Anything to get through the day. I literally wanted it to go by as quickly as possible. I was bored.

Day 10 I bought groceries. Hallelujah! Praise Jesus! It was time to buy groceries. Just looking at the ingredients made me happy.  I had the list of healthy restaurants I wanted to try and the first wine bottle ready for my upcoming nondetoxing days. Just. One. More. Day.

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And BAM! That was it, I did the Master Cleanse. 10 days of lemonade and tea.  I can’t say I feel like an angel in heaven, light as a feather, one with the universe. But I do feel better. Besides physically feeling better I think my biggest accomplishment was the mental challenge of not eating any food. Not one little bite.  How did I do that?

Would I recommend the Master Cleanse?

I would say if it’s something you want to try and have been thinking about doing some type of cleanse then yes, try it. You can do it and you’ll feel better.  Also, it’s not too expensive compared to other juice cleanses and it’s really easy to prepare each morning.

If it’s not something you’ve thought of doing before then don’t try it. You won’t understand it or believe in it or know what’s going on. It’ll be torture. And you’ll cheat.

For the ones that may try any type of juice cleanse, this is the one tip I have after my 10 days.  It wasn’t until day 7 that I really felt better like the organs were actually getting cleansed and my body knew what was going on.  I think 1 day, 3 day, or 5 day cleanses might not give your body a true break if that makes sense.  I wouldn’t do anything less than a 10 day cleanse if I was to do it again…

Did I lose weight on the Master Cleanse?

I better have! Not consuming any food for a week better have made me lose weight or something is terribly wrong!

The truth, I didn’t weigh myself before or after.  I wanted to keep this cleanse about cleaning out my body. I thought if I weighed myself before then all my focus would be on my weight. Not on cleansing or detoxing. I didn’t want that. I assume as soon as you start eating again the weight comes right back on anyway so there’s enough other days in my life to focus on how much I weigh. Not during my Master Cleanse.

And that’s it! My very uneducated review/experience with the Master Cleanse. I’m happy I lived through it, I’m happy I accomplished all 10 days, and I’m excited it’s over 🙂

To be clear, I am not a doctor. I do not recommend doing this without seeing a doctor first.

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  1. Hurray!!!!!!!! I really should have done this along side of you! I remember when we did the fruit and veggies for a month! I lost 8 lbs! Congrats! Miss you as always! 🙂 Big Moore