Ok. Ok. So when I first mentioned my few weeks of life changing events I said it was a combination of things. One was Jury Duty but the other was a book. Somehow, the stars aligned in a way that helped me read Love Warrior by Glennon Doyle Melton during my week of Jury Duty. fyi – There is plenty of opportunity to read while on Jury Duty, it feels like you’re constantly sitting in the small Jury Room waiting for the courtroom to be ready. I was easily able to finish reading Love Warrior… and wow.
I first heard of Glennon Doyle on Chelsea! about a year ago. Since then, I’ve been wanting to read her book, but procrastinated. I picked it up, and even read a page or 2 several different times, but always ended up putting it down. At first glance, the book seemed too emotional & strong (if that makes sense) which scared me away from it. Emotionally deep books (and movies) gets my anxiety on it’s tip toes so I tend to avoid them. However, Love Warrior was the only book I packed in my purse for Jury Duty, leaving me no choice but to get through it.
Lucky for me, because this book changed me in a similar way Jury Duty did.
Let me explain. I recently had a truce with my anxiety, where I looked it in the eye with a smile & shifted my mind to start using it as a tool. (Also on Chelsea!), a woman being interviewed asked Chelsea to name 3 qualities she likes about herself, and they couldn’t be physical. I listened, laughed and fell asleep. In the morning, I was driving to work & thought about that same question. 3 qualities I like about myself, and they can’t be physical. One of the answers that kept creeping in my mind was – anxiety. Wtf. I thought anxiety was something I hated. But, I started feeling like Batman’s bestie. Powerful, relieved, and excited. I told myself, anxiety is a superpower. A freaking superpower! Because of anxiety, I’m uber aware of feelings & emotions. They’re loud, and they’re always there for me to hear. And if I can control them a little, they can be a badass superpower. And that’s exactly what I’m going to make them.
Thank you to everyone for your feedback on the Jury Duty post! I can’t describe the relief it was to feel other people understand where I was coming from… The experience made me think I was alone on an island called Understanding – so thank you thank you thank you! And like I said, I’m not done with this, so stay tuned. My wheels are spinning! Please continue to let me know if you have similar stories, ideas, thoughts – I love hearing them!
Today, I’m getting off the serious train & into something I consider a little more enjoyable. I become overwhelmed & disengage quickly when someone is in a constant heavy subject. Even for me, that gets exhausting. I need to full circle of conversation. I also try to enjoy my life & freedoms as much as possible because I know they are not granted to everyone.
Let’s talk Black Friday & Cyber Monday. Fuck that shit! (Yeah right, I spent the entire weekend scrolling the internet in efforts to procrastinate all other tasks. Procrastination does not end in college.)
HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE! Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday ever!!! It’s a holiday where you eat, relax, meet up with friends/family, eat again, and hopefully be grateful. This is the bee knees of holidays people, there’s nothing better. (I also love all the shopping sales that closely follow. Ha!) But it simply wouldn’t be a Thanksgiving without being able to say what you’ve been thankful for…
Wafiq and I have a ritual of saying what we’re thankful for almost daily. When times were a little tougher I think we would say them twice a day… Taking time to challenge each other in a grateful war always makes the mood brighter. And it takes your mind off all that negative shit that’s stuck up in that brain of yours.
This year, I have TONS to be grateful for, so lets get into it!
Finally the day has come, we moved into a different space. Remember when I moved into this tiny apartment and I was so happy? I believed that was literally all I needed in life, a perfect shelter. I’m still on the small living environment kick, too much space gives me anxiety. I know most people hate moving but I’ve decided I love it, I’ve moved a lot and lived out of a suitcase more years in my life than I’ve had a closet. Not really.
Getting rid of shit is my jam. It gives me the same excited butterflies you’re supposed to get when you see your significant other. Moving forces you to really purge shit out. All those things that Wafiq was making us hold on to because “we have space” are officially at Goodwill. And all the stupid clothes, cheap gimmicks and nonsense you can find on THIS list are gone! Moving is a breeze because all our “things” (besides the bed, sofa, and TV) fit in a few boxes 🙂 Awww my favorite feeling.
One of the many reasons we’re so excited about our new place is that the view is open to trees, no more walking path! What do you guys see when you look outside your window? We started feeling a little like we were living in a hamster cage because our windows opened to a walking path that people loved to bring their dogs to, so we happy peeps right now.
As you may have heard, there’s a hurricane that recently f*cked up parts of Texas. In Austin, we lost power for 20 hours & had wind + rain but nothing much larger than our regular storms. Please remember, when you’re thinking of Houston and all the damage it’s done, there are several smaller communities that have been damaged as well & also need help + resources. The less popular babies need attention too 🙂 I have to say, it’s refreshing to run through my Facebook feed and see all my Texas friends coming together to love & support one another. No more wrestling over topics that don’t serve a purpose or creating fights & arguments because we’re bored. There was awhile there I didn’t even check FB. So, proud of Texas right now and proud to be a part of the state.
And mother earth must be freaking PISSED off right now, brewing storms all over the place. EEEk. I pray everyone stays safe & cuddled with their people. Love love love.
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