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5 Rules-for-Bragging
Life, The Best You

5 Rules For Acceptable Bragging

Did You Know?  In a survey of 2,000 people, more than 75% admitted to lying about themselves on social profiles.  Only 18% said that their Twitter and Facebook profiles accurately represent them.

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There’s something about being a badass bragger that I love.

If you do it wrong, than bragging is horrifically obnoxious.

5 Rules-for-Bragging

I love hearing people talk about what they’re passionate about, what makes them happy.  Whether that was a time in their life or an event they’re currently going through.  To see them get excited & feel comfortable enough opening up is exciting.  Conversations like these really get me going.

 

But there’s also people that don’t know how to brag properly.  They’re more focused on being a show off than sharing good news.  I think if you have to glorify every part of your life & constantly talk about it, there must be some self-confidence issues going on.  (LOL I’m laughing at my physiological conclusions here, but stay with me)

 

I broke down 5 Rules To A Good Brag because I think at some point bragging is awesome, but you have to do it correctly.

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5 Rules-for-Bragging

5 Rules-for-Bragging

5 Rules-for-Bragging

5 Rules To Being A Badass Bragger

  1. Wait for someone to ASK YOU about something.  This rule is a little tricky because sometimes people don’t know what to ask.  But, for the most part, always wait for someone to ask about you & what you’ve been up to. If that’s your children, dog, career, vacation, relationship, boyfriend – wait for them to ask.  “How’s work going?”  “I saw you ran a marathon, was it hard?” “How’s Bernice?”  If they never ask, that’s pretty telling, they don’t give a shit. HA!  Send them to my post on: LISTENING.
  2. Shut Up.  Conversation tip across the board – Shut Up.  Don’t go on forever about anything, ever.  No matter who you are or how important the info you’re sharing is, remember to cut it off. Or at least stop, breathe, and ask for questions?
  3. Think about the WHY.  Why are you sharing?  Are you sharing because you want to feel better about yourself?  That’s not the right reason.  Are you sharing because you’re excited & want others to feel excited too?  Then brag away! But don’t brag simply so you can feel cool, or better, or special.  Brag because you’re overjoyed & want others to feel overjoyed too.
  4. Always express your GENUINE gratitude & appreciation.  This is the most important one to being a good bragger.  You have to always make sure you express how lucky you are to be married to the top RE Agent in the U.S. ( 😉 )  Or how grateful you are to travel through the African Safari for 6 months of the year.  Or how appreciative you are that you have the career of your dreams.  I don’t know what you’re bragging about, but it’s important to ALWAYS be humble while bragging.  Then others know, you know, you’re lucky.
  5. Try to include your audience.  Sometimes you might be bragging about something huge.  You’re getting married, you’re having a kid.. That’s big stuff, and likely your audience isn’t going through that large of an event to equally be able to brag about it… Still try to include them, rather than talk AT them forever.  If they have kids, or got married, try to relate or ask questions.  Help them remember those times.  Bring them in, because talking AT people is really annoying, so do your best to include them somehow.5 Rules-for-Bragging

5 Rules-for-Bragging5 Rules-for-Bragging

5 Rules-for-Bragging

 

What do you think about Bragging?!  Funny topic right?  Bragging is weird to admit because it’s so much conversation about yourself!  But it’s fun to be excited with people who are excited, so if you brag correctly – then brag away!

 

I’m off to brag to Wafiq about how I was paid today and have yet to blow it all online shopping!  I’m sharing with him because I’m excited & I’ll ask him how he’s doing on his savings so we can be proud together!  HA!

 

Have a great weekend everyone! Go out, brag away, and be thoughtful…

 

Xx


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Story Telling - Aliens
Life, Story Telling

The Story Of: The Time I Found Out Aliens Are Real

Did You Know?  “To prevent competitors from also inseminating female mates, some male insects stay latched to the female for days on end. The male Indian stick insect, Necroscia sparaxes, has the record in scientific literature at 79 days.”

( v i a )


Hi everyone!

I have a horrific story to share…

Aliens DO exist & I now, know this for a fact.

Story Telling - Aliens

I was in my office last week and a friend came running through the doors looking for a guy to help them. (Of course, she was not looking for me in this situation, you’ll understand why later.)  She seemed a little more frantic than normal so I asked what happened.  She said there was a bug outside in the hallway.  I thought that was interesting because she’s not afraid of bugs. And she didn’t mention what type of bug. Are we talking spider, cockroach, beetle? In my almighty moment I told her I would go take a look – I’ve recently made truce with large spiders & felt I could at the very least monitor a cockroach while we wait for someone to get it, worst case scenario.

 

I went out into the hallway & a saw an alien sprinting down the wall, where the floor meets the bottom of the wall.  This mother fucker had more than 1,000 legs and was a foot long.  A centipede the size of a ruler with a 1 inch body circumference (1 INCH THICK BODY!), I’m not even talking how far it’s legs spread.    Dark color. Fast.  Agile. And foreign.  Unfortunately, I am NOT exaggerating.

 

I ran back into my office, called the 2 guys nearby and told them there was a bug in the vicinity.  I should have specified Alien because they took too long to get to the hallway and the alien proceeded to run toward the elevator shaft for safety. There wasn’t a chance in hell I was getting in it’s way either. My friend did run towards it & tried waving it away from the elevator, when said Alien lifted half it’s body & legs in the air as a warning to step the fuck away.

 

Now.  I’ve had many run ins with bugs before & am familiar with their strategies.  That asshole wasn’t going far down the elevator shaft to find a new home, he was waiting right inside it for his perfect getaway.  I tried to warn the people.  “Back away!  It’s right inside the shaft, it’s going to come back out & it can sprint!”  No one took me seriously.  They stood INSIDE the elevator to look down the shaft to search for the alien… NOT A GOOD IDEA PEOPLE.  That alien showed an entire side of tentacles out the side of the elevator shaft and everyone screamed louder than the fire alarms as they bursted out the elevator doors & quickly ran out of the entire building.  No one looked confident anymore.  The guys were panicking.  In this moment, thank God for gender roles.

 

It was at this point, everyone knew the severity of the situation.

 

Long story short, we ended up trying to electrocute the alien & then poison it with toxic spray – neither worked, of course, it has fucking alien powers.  One of the guys ended up finding a trash picker and was able to grab the alien & remove him.  It was necessary to kill it before questioning.

 

I will say, every single person was flabbergasted.  At a loss for words.  Because it did prove life beyond Earth is very real.  And it doesn’t conform to our standard of delightful by any means.

 

I’m still unable to put my feet down while sitting at my chair & am constantly on the lookout for other large aliens here on Earth.  I had vomit at the tip of my throat all day after my run in with this creature. I used to be afraid of large, flying cockroaches – I had no idea.

 

Be on guard today… and be thoughtful,

 

Xx


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Beauty

Glamglow Gravitymud Mask – I Tried It For You

Did You Know?  In Mauritania, Africa – Obesity has long been the ideal of beauty, signaling a family’s wealth in a land repeatedly wracked by drought. Nomadic people struggling to survive the harsh desert came to prize fatness as a sign of health.

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I’ve been reading beauty blogs & watching beauty YouTubers for a few years now.  They suck me in & before you know it I’m 10 videos deep with a long list of new products I NEED.  Then, I get to the store & notice the first item on my long list is .5oz of face cream that’s $90… and I have no money left for anything else.  Story of my life.

 GlamGlow-Face-Mask(2)

I’ve gotten better at prioritizing.  What’s worth the money & what isn’t.  There are bloggers/YouTubers that I’ve learned not to trust & others that I have to rush out & buy their product suggestions immediately!

Face Masks are always a big deal for me.  1 – they’re all super expensive, so experimenting isn’t very easy.   2 – They’re ideal because taking good care of my skin helps with my no makeup routine.

I noticed this silver Glamglow face mask all over the place & finally thought, fuck it.  I’ll spend the money, try it for a month, then tell you what I think.  Are the expensive face products that everyone flaunts worth it??  I’m determined to find out & this mask was the first one off the picking block.

 GlamGlow-GravityMud-Mask(1)

I went to Sephora & bought the Glamglow Gravitymud Firming Treatment Mask.  It comes in a large package but a very small jar.   Already kind of annoying considering it’s $70, but I’m committed.

The box says: “Firm, Lift, Tighten, Tone, Sexy Contours” and it’s supposed to be a solution for fine lines & wrinkles, uneven skin tone, and loss of firmness & elasticity.

I brought it home & immediately tried it.  There’s a small brush inside the box that’s super helpful with the application process, which I loved.  Once it was on my face I let it sit for 30 minutes, then proceeded to “peel” it off.

This is the part that annoys me about the mask.  Everyone is so pumped up about the mask peeling off, but it doesn’t.  I mean sure it kind of peels off if you use a super thick layer of product & carefully spend your time trying to successfully peel off as much as you can, followed by rinsing off the rest.  I’d just as well wash the whole damn thing off.  Weird for me, the “peeling” part.  Maybe the same people that enjoy popping zits would enjoy attempting to peel off a mask? Doesn’t get me going.  So, that part of the mask for me is a major fail & a dumb reason to spend money.

GlamGlow-Face-Mask

I continued to use the mask 3x a week for an entire month. Sometimes before bed, other times before applying makeup, and also in the mornings on days where I wouldn’t wear makeup. I should mention, the little jar of product does last awhile & it’s a more comfortable mask to wear with a yummy sent.

Once I took the mask off, my skin felt fresh & a little gummy.  In a good way, almost like a dewy primer.  That part I liked.

Overall, I think this mask is good when you have somewhere to go.  Keep in your drawer for the days you have an event to go to or you’re traveling & need a wake up for your face.  After a month, I didn’t notice any super noticeable differences in fine lines or firmness.  Unless I used the mask that day or night before, my face doesn’t look or feel any different than before I bought the little jar.  You know what I mean?  It was nice to have for the day, but it’s not a miracle worker long term.

Would I buy it again? Maybe.  I can see where it’s nice to have in the rotation of your face products but I don’t see what the rage is about the mask.  I wish I could rage about it.  I’m going to try a few other Glamglow masks that also have positive reviews & see if there’s one that really makes me a believer.  I’d be happy to report back.

GlamGlow-GravityMud-Mask(1)

For now, you’re not alone if you don’t buy the magic, silver peel off mask. The mask is ok.  But it’s not the fountain of youth.

Does anyone have mask recommendations? I have a few that I actually do love, but am always looking for more!

Have a great day today & be thoughtful,

Xx

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Style

Affordable Office Outfit Series: H&M

Week 3 of affordable, comfortable, EASY office clothes to complete your {I-never-see-the-light-during-the-day} wardrobes comes from H&M!

For me, H&M is either a major hit or a super flop when it comes to affordable office clothing.  Sometimes I’ll go through looooooong phases of being unpleased with the clothes, pricing, OR both.  And other times I’ll end up buying the whole store & walk away spending a little less than $50 (<<< some of the best days of my life).

Right now, we’re in the later of the two options.

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H&M is killing it w/their options & pricing at the moment.

Comfortable, basic, affordable clothes to revamp the office wardrobe for CHEAP!  Yes. Please.

I would’ve done an H&M post first, but I know their store locations are not as easy to find as a Target or Forever 21.  I have to say, totally worth shopping online through H&M’s website.  The stores are always so busy!

 affordable-office-style-hm

Pants $10!  (  Similar:  HERE  ) These pants look a little like leggings at the top, as they don’t have belt loops, but they aren’t stretchy & still hold in your legs (LOL is that a thing?) so you won’t look like you rolled out of bed & went to work in yoga pants.  They have them in so many colors & I will be purchasing them all.

Shirt $15!  (  Similar:  HERE  )  Seriously.  This one and about 100 more similar to the one I’m wearing are available at H&M now – I would hop on it!  The mix & match between the pants & shirts, you’ll never need to shop stupid office clothes again #blessed.

I should also note, H&M jewelry has always been the place I like to buy affordable (it’s ok if I lose/break it) items.  They have pretty pieces that don’t tarnish quickly & are super affordable.

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That’s it for my affordable office series!  I really wanted to show you how affordable & easy new office clothes can look at a few super common retailers.

It’s a battle I’m always discussing w/friends – you don’t want to spend $$$$$ on clothes only your computer screen is going to see BUT you have to look like you tried a little for that one time your boss walks in…  I hope this inspired that mission.

As for me, I’m needing to vent that I’m completely over hot weather.  Anyone living somewhere that is cold or slightly cold right now?  Tell me about it please, inspire me to move.  We were out at a fundraiser Saturday & I almost passed out from heat stroke, we’re still pushing 100 degrees!  No thanks, over it.  Until the temps change, you can find me enjoying the comforts of my own A/C.

Have a great week everyone!! Remember to be thoughtful 🙂

 

Xx

Other awesome h&m office items:

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F*** It Friday

F*** It Friday – I’m NOT Down With Turmeric Milk

I love trying pretty much everything I read about.  I obsess over other bloggers & their ideas + creativity.  New food, new makeup, new skin product, new style, new idea, new adventure – I’ll try it.

Wafiq laughs at me. After my garlic discoveries I went wild on the internet, fell in love with a ton of bloggers, and experimented like crazy.

Sorry to burst anyone’s bubble but majority of the these new ideas I try for a month… & stop.  They don’t have the same amazing results I read about.  I barely admit that to myself & never admit it to Wafiq or my friends. EVERYTHING I DO WORKS!  Yeah right, this was my first realization I was in lala land.

 No-Turmeric-Milk

One time I tried: Turmeric Milk.  Remember that trend rotating through blogs?

The health benefits of turmeric, having a night time “treat” that was healthy, the beautiful pictures, and the unique recipe had me going.

I bought all the ingredients & was ready to see results.

Wafiq watched me that evening as I was opening the coconut milk and measuring out turmeric.  If you don’t know, turmeric is an ingredient they often use in Indian Food dishes, specifically Curry.  It’s what gives curry the orange/yellow color.

Both Wafiq and I are major curry lovers.  Another reason I expected this recipe to be a major win.

After measuring all the ingredients, pouring the end product into a large coffee cup, it was the first time Wafiq told me he didn’t think this was such a great idea.

I took my first sip.

It wasn’t good.

But I didn’t care because drinking garlic juice wasn’t good either but it nearly saved my life.

So I chugged the whole glass of turmeric milk. (throw up in my mouth, throw up in my mouth, throw up in my mouth)

Wafiq was watching & kind of laughed.

I kind of laughed.

And that was it.  I went to sit down and continue watching TV.  About 3 minutes later I felt S I C K ! Very very very nauseous.  I didn’t want to tell Wafiq. I never tell anyone when one of these ideas fails me.  And this one was failing me hard!

He could see me starting to sweat a little.  Literally.

We couldn’t conversate as I felt like any moment I was going to vomit, yet he kept pushing conversations? He knew.  I finally had to tell him I didn’t feel well.   His smirk was money.

I had to slowly move myself to the bed.  This was baaaaaaaaad.  I have a pretty strong stomach but I really felt my insides were about to projectile bright turmeric yellow all over the bedroom.  The entire night I had to concentrate hard on not vomiting.  Props to Wafiq because he didn’t rub it in my face, I think he felt bad.  Until the next morning when I was alive again, then he had a good laugh at me.  I had to laugh too.  Not everything is going to work for me or be as good as I read it to be, and I definitely needed a reality check – this was it.

I still can’t think about curry.  I still can’t think about coconut milk.  Or turmeric.

When I read about turmeric now I want to cry.  I can never have it again!!

F*** It. This wasn’t a win for me.  Just wasn’t.  Some ideas aren’t meant for everyone.  And that’s ok to admit.

No-Turmeric-Milk

Have you ever been there? Wanted to like something so badly but you just don’t?  OMG another one for me – Oysters.  WAH! I’ll try them again soon & hopefully have an enjoyable experience.

You know what I mean?  I feel like we all have that one thing that got us, one way or another.

F*** It.  I’ll be over here sipping wine as my evening “treat” going forward.

Have a fantastic weekend everyone, stay away from turmeric milk (kidding), and be thoughtful!

Xx

 

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I recommend..., Life

The Best: Waterproof Phone Case

As you may know, I recently discovered Amazon Prime.  Yes, I was living under a rock & had no idea how convenient and wonderful Amazon Prime could be.

Since then, I’ve gone slightly out of control with my amazon purchases.

The ONLY thing you need to know: This waterproof iPhone case is gold.

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And let me preface by saying: It’s $8!

No – this is not my product, nor my invention, nor am I being sponsored. I’m in love.

I was saving this secret for my monthly favorites but literally couldn’t resist sharing.  I’ve stayed away from my computer all day, making an effort not to post, knowing I’m keeping the worlds largest secret, and now here I am: posting.

With this phone case –> you can bring your phone in the water.  Pool or beach. Big phone, little phone.  Protects from sand, water splashes, suffocating.

And how completely perfect for traveling adventures?!

You can take pictures, videos, talk, snap, instagram.  Same phone capabilities – just protected, safe & sound. Cute.

PS. Before you say this phone cover is not cute – watch the Kardashians, they looked real cute using a similar device in a recent episode. At least I thought so.

Ok, I can say no more.  You need this case. It’s worth it.  You’ll thank me later. No regret, no surrender!

If you have any Amazon secrets, please share!  I’m highly addicted.

 

Happy Monday everyone –

 

Xx

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Life, Personal Updates, Thoughts

Choosing My Mood: HAPPY

I’ve been in a fantastic mood all week!  Don’t you love when that happens?  And I’m extra excited to write when I’m in a great mood – spread that energy around.

 Choosing Happy

Last week was a damper.  The whole last month had me feeling emotional.  Too much happening in America that weighs heavy on you after hearing & seeing so much of it.  Once something bad happens it kind of spirals. You know?  (Anyone watch The Secret?)

I stayed away from writing because BLAH.

 Choosing Happy

The good news – this week I’ve been feeling stell!  Such a mental decision to be happy.

When I wasn’t feeling that chipper I couldn’t figure out why everything felt soo off.  My mood wasn’t extraordinary & everything else seemed to be dragging too.

I told myself I was going to ignore the news & social media & hot conversations.  I wanted to be happy.

I had to make an effort, but thought it was worth a try.  And it worked!  Every time I do this it reminds me how welcoming other people are to such happiness & kindness.  Or I should say, how quickly you attract the same kindness you project.  People need it too.

And people that aren’t kind shouldn’t bring us down with them.  A negative person shouldn’t change a positive person.  Even though negativity is incredibly toxic, it’s worth the effort to avoid.

 Choosing Happy

If you couldn’t tell –> Kindness is basically my favorite thing on planet earth & beyond.

So, last weekend Wafiq & I spent some time at the pool + cooking some new {delicious} recipes. I went to the grocery store & as a result – I vowed not to go outside for the rest of the summer between the hours of 11:00pm – 4:00pm.  It’s the sun! KILLS. ME.

People in Texas (or Dubai), always tell me they could NEVER live in the cold when they find out I’m from Minnesota (the Arctic North).

BUT WHY?!

Winter in Minnesota is the same as Summer in Texas or Dubai. You stay inside. What’s the difference!?  At least in the winter you can layer up the clothes and manage the outdoors.  Am I wrong here?!

I suppose it all comes down to preference.

Choosing Happy

How’s everyone else doing this summer?

I’m having fun w/some new blog post ideas this month.  I’m really starting to love blogging.  It’s kind of a trick to figure out but it’s worth it – brainstorming new ideas & constantly working the creative side of my brain.

I’m loving the process.

Wafiq is surprisingly busy considering he doesn’t have a job at the moment.

And Bernice is on board with the No Outdoors between 12:00pm – 4:00pm house rule I’ve established.

As long as I stay positive & avoid outdoors between the hours of 12:00pm – 4:00pm +++ keep the cold drinks flowing –> I’m destined to have a great rest of the summer!

 

Talk later!

 

Xx

 

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Blogger, Places: Middle East, Thoughts

What I Miss About Living In Dubai

Never did I ever, expect to be writing this list.  What I Miss About Living In Dubai. 

What an adventure that was! I’m in the U.S. now, have been for awhile, and am FINALLY able to look back on the experience of living in Dubai and come to terms with the fact that I DO miss particular parts.  Whether I want to admit it or not, I sit down some days and think about my life as an expat with a little grin. Other days I sit down and praise Jesus I’m back in the U.S.  I appreciate both.

What I Miss About Living In Dubai:

–  The beautiful Burj Khalifa (that gorgeous beast)

–  Driving.  (PSA: American’s, SLOW THE FUCK DOWN)

–  The Palm Jumeirah (nothing like vacation out the front door)

–  Work. (Independence, Confidence, Flexibility, Variety, Equality)

–  Shopping. (Waaaaaaaahhhh!! <Literally, eyes watering>)

–  Bahraini’s (and Bahrain being so close, little doo doo island life)

–  Feeling safe. (All. Of. The. Time.)

–  Mosque’s (+ the call to prayer)

–  Camels (Cutest wild animals ever!)

–  Dubai Fountain (Magic)

–  Open desert (much like the ocean – open, peaceful space that brings calmness)

–  Lebanese Food (Hellooooo beet salads and tabbouleh)

–  Orange sunsets (with a huge ass glowing orange sun)

–  Dubai Marina (…because WOW. Not a bad place to spend happy hour every day)

–  Australians (Wafiq and I can not forget our gym instructor. SO. HOT.)

–  Real rules (..and people actually following them)

–  Fresh dates (My sweet baby loves, come to me)

–  Cleanliness (from the houses to the cars to the shopping malls to the streets)

–  The Shopping Malls (Yes, this needs to be added twice)

–  Religion (proud believers. No if’s / and’s / or but’s)

–  Diversity (travel, culture, conversation)

–  Biryani (Specifically from Wafiq’s house)

–  Friends (the couple of people I had to leave behind that truly impacted my life)

Calling all expats! Anything else I’m missing? What do you miss? 🙂

 

Xx MissBassmaster

WIMAD(1)

Burj Khalifa

Open desert

Desert

WIMAD(2)

Dubai Marina

WIMAD(3)

Palm Jumeirah

WIMAD(4)

Sand Storms

WIMAD(5)

Burj Al Arab

 

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Personal Updates, Thoughts

I’m the Worry Wart.

I’m a crazy person. For real. C R A Z Y .

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I have MAJOR, MAXIMUM, GINORMOUS, problems with worrying. I worry all the freaking time. You name it, I’ll worry about it. (So don’t name it, I can’t handle the pressure!)

My latest struggle is worrying about the stability of my new job. I think because I’ve been in Real Estate the past 2 years and working on commission I never worried about my job disappearing.

Which sounds strange, because I think people assume commission jobs are a gamble + unstable. Which is true. But a lot of the risk is in your control.

As a real estate agent, if you need a big month, (or a big couple months) you put your head down and bust your ass –> your work will be rewarded. More effort = More money. Less effort = Less money.

Also, I feel like working as an agent you’re never SUPER dependent on the company you’re employed to. If they closed or decided to lay you off or fire you, you can take your clients and hop over to the next. Lots of people do it without even a hiccup in their income stream.

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But here I am, my first week at a salary paying job.. And I’m freaked the f*** out.

Like B A D.

How do people do this?

Let me just add, the company I’m working for isn’t small. It’s not HUGE, but it’s not small. Not a start-up. Not a company that’s struggling to pay the bills by any means. But I have this overwhelming fear that in a week or 2 they’ll say: “Pack up your box, we decided we didn’t need an extra hand after all” Peace.

I feel like my life is in their hands.

My solution: Go to therapy. Once I get settled down for a second. For this situation and my laundry list of other worries that don’t make sense.

I’m a full believer in therapy. I’ll vomit if someone tells me they have nothing to say to a therapist because their life is freaking cupcakes and roses. But that’s a WHOLE other post waiting to happen.

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In the meantime, I’m dealing with this annoyance by staying busy {mothers advice} and reading about essential oils that sooth the nerves.

Read. Work. Run. Work. Cook. Organize. Read. Run. Cook. Eat. Breathe Lavender. <— Repeat.

 

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Thoughts

“Women are treated so bad over there”

I was mentally “there” and ready to come back to blogging. With a clear, positive mind. Time to rock and roll!

The day after I wrote my “Back” post I had an interview that threw me down the swirling toilet of negativity.

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The Story:

I walked into an interview at a very prestigious company. Probably the most reputable company I’ve interviewed with. Ever.

Office was amazing. Walls with full glass windows on a high floor building. Not a speck of dust in sight. Business. Money. Boom.

I filled out a 3 page, formal application and shortly afterwords a cute blonde girl walked in to start the interview. She asked me your typical interview questions and then said her supervisor would be coming in to ask some questions as well.

Her supervisor entered with a strong presence. You know how some people walk in a room and you can feel their intense voice when they aren’t talking? They’re going to speak loud. And if you’re me, you prepare to do the same.

That was this woman. She screamed with her body.

I’m a woman power type of person. I appreciate a woman who comes in guns blazing. Ready to talk business. Get rough. So I was ready.

A long time ago I would have pooped my pants. But these days, I get excited.

Let’s do this.

She sat down and skimmed through my resume. Asking about me, to the other blonde girl. As if I’m not in the room. (Intimidation tactics, love it).

Then she said in a very unemotional, matter of fact way : “You went to Dubai.”

Trying to sound neutral: “Yes, I did. For a year and a half.”

“I’m surprised you picked Dubai considering how women are treated over there.”

This is where things went south. Toilet –> flush.

She went on and on and on telling me how women are treated in Dubai. They have to cover themselves <– was her main point of concern. I felt like what she said translated to:  “How stupid can you be, you dumb girl, to go to a country that treats women so terribly?! You must have not done your research”

PS. No, she’s never been to Dubai or to any country in the Middle East. (But she must have done her research?!)

My response after about 15 minutes of this was:

“(Pause). Some women do chose to wear an abaya, so in that way it’s not bad”

This threw her overboard. Wrong answer Katie. Wrong gosh darn answer.

She followed by saying that turning a blind eye to these poor women puts me in the same category as abusers (I guess). She proceeded to make some relation to slavery, uneducated people, and a whole bunch of other gibberish facts that in my opinion have nothing to do with the clothing choice of middle eastern women.

CRAY.    CRAY.

This is where I started questioning life.  While she was rambling I went through a full circle of emotions.

  • Dumb bitch dont know nothin
  • Was going to Dubai a mistake, did it ruin my life?!
  • Don’t say anything, don’t say anything, don’t say anything
  • There’s a million problems over there, but an abaya aint one.
  • Is this happening? Is she for real?

Well it was.

The problem is, my interview BEFORE this one went the same way. Women in the Middle East was the first topic covered. Why? I don’t know.

What happened in that interview? I blacked out. I was pissed off.

I blacked out while locking eyes with the man and then proceeded to correct his facts and educate him on the realty of my experience.

The rest of that interview was extremely awkward.

So my family and friends decided it was best if I don’t say anything when/if that happens again. Which is what I did.

Damned if I do, damned if I don’t. Because not saying anything doesn’t feel like a solution either.

In no way will I ever say I regret going to Dubai. Because I don’t. After hearing this woman speak I’m actually really grateful that I went. That I will never sound like her.

I left feeling bad that there’s still Americans out there that are so judgmental.

I left wanting to take her to coffee, in a non interview setting, and discuss really loud and passionately all the good and bad of the Middle East. Maybe even wrestle or punch each other – if necessary.

Because let’s be honest. The Middle East isn’t my favorite place. I have enough negative things to say that I don’t need to make assumptions about problems that I didn’t see.  But I sure as hell hate when people disrespect ANYTHING in an uneducated, inaccurate way.

You want to talk bad about the region, I’m ready. But let’s do it in the right setting, where we can get loud, and be honest.

You want to talk great about the region, I’m ready. I would love to hear the stories and remember those parts too.

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And my final note…

Why do American’s care SO much about women in the Middle East wearing an Abaya?

Think about it like this—>

Women in Dubai: They wear a black Abaya (maxi dress), with long sleeves, every day as their formal wear. To work or in public, or to a funeral or maybe a business meeting. It’s their formal dress.

Men in America: They wear a suit and tie to work every day. Long sleeves, sometimes with a jacket, in 100 degree weather, often including a tie around their neck that nearly chokes them at any given moment. It’s their formal dress.

Do all women in Dubai apply to the above statement? No. Do all men in America apply to the above statement? No.

But neither is weird.  Both are formal. Both are professional. If we make fun of men in suits and say they’re treated so terribly because of that God forsaken tie that nearly chokes them to their death, will we sound weird?

I know that’s a dramatic comparison.  I’m trying to somehow show that focusing on the clothing choice of women in Dubai is not that big of a deal. There’s so much more to talk about. Promise 🙂

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